As Jules Said, (Not So) Freaky .... - Best Moments Award

Last year I wrote a post telling you how Ishbel and I met up with a couple of friends we met on Twitter. Well really it was a friend and her husband; Julia R Barrett and her husband Oscar.  Oscar doesn't do twitter, much too busy ... Anyway we became great friends with Julia over a couple of months and she thought it might be a good idea to meet up as they passed through London on their way to a hiking trip in Wales.  Arrangements were made and they duly arrived and, as I said this resulted in me posting Julia and Oscar, read it here. 

Well, lots of folks read that post, one of whom was Marylin Warner, Marylin does not do twitter either but she does write and post a weekly letter to her mother who has Alzheimer's, reminding her mother of their past conversations and the life lessons that she had instilled in Marylin and others and that Marylin, through her posts, now passes on to her family and of course to us through the medium of her blog. Marylin's blog can be found at 'Things I Want To Tell My Mother', here 

Well Marylin remembered my post, I think she is a little bit like Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory in that she must possess an eidetic memory to remember so much of what she has learnt over the years.  Marylin's post to her mother last week took a slight twist in that she informed her mother, and us that she had been nominated for a 'Best Moment Award' on one of her earlier writings and in keeping with the award she had to nominate others and bless her cotton socks, as well as awarding much more deserving posts, including Julia, she included me, that post can be seen here

All it remains for me to do then, is to thank Marylin profusely for thinking about me and for including my poor attempts at communication, in her basking sunshine.  That's what she does over on her blog once a week, she brings a little ray of sunshine into your life and if you have had a poor day or week, her soliloquising on past and every day events makes you smile, they make you ponder the meaning of life and they make you grateful and thankful that the world is not full of people who do not respect the rights of others and it makes you hopeful that because of her and others like her who have hearts that are so full of love and tender caring feelings, that this world isn't that bad, after all........

So, if Marylin Warner can take it.. My first nomination goes right back to her - just follow the links above to Marylin's site, YOU REALLY WILL NOT REGRET IT

Julia R Barret over at http://juliarachelbarrett.net/ who is, in the words of Amy Farrah Fowler, 'MY BESTIE on this internet thingy writes amazing blogs about her life and her books and then just to confuse us uneducated peasants throws in an in-depth, well researched, post on nutrition, medical matters or anything else that she decides needs to be ripped apart - and confuses the hell out of me and makes me laugh out loud, giggle and blush in equal part, pop over and visit and say a big Hi, here 

Penny Watson over at Penny Romance is so outrageous at times you almost choke on your own tongue at some of what she says and does and if you are a guy and you have a beard, send her a photo, she loves (almost) any bearded guy, if you have nice pecs, so much the better.  I suspect her dream date would be a bearded James Bond and a few Martini's but lord knows what she would do with him after the drinks..........

Lorca Damon over at Lorca Damon.com Lorca comes or at least should come with a health warning the pain that she inflicts from laughing so much is just not funnneeeee at all, but you just can't not revisit to see what she says next - not wearing a bra or bathing for 4 days, oh gawd my sides ........ I couldn't even put a response on there as I was scared of the reply I might get ....

John Malik over at ChefJohnMalik.com is, as you can see from the title of his blog, an accomplished chef, or so he says, and I believe   I have never had the opportunity to taste any of his dishes, but when he fires up the old keyboard and it gets to the correct temperature he can certainly cook a well written recipe of writings on a diverse range of topics from the love and care of residents in a care home facility that he was the executive chef in, to a farewell note to a beloved pet and a heart throbbing pedal pounding description of his latest escapade on his mountain bike although he really needs to have some work done on those hairy legs before posting any more photos of them.... 

Jaye Manus I have no idea what Jaye is saying half the time, I am far too thick to understand it, but over at http://jwmanus.wordpress.com/ she seems to spend her time giving succour, comfort and unpaid advice to aspiring self publishers on how to go about getting their own works published , she really is a good egg giving so much of her time to help others - another one of those 'nice people' that draws you in and you feel so comfortable with when in her company...

Pauses for a break.......

Well I could go on and on and I believe in the rules we are allowed up to 15 nominations, but If I keep going I'll be here all day.  If I have missed you in this posting please, please forgive me I am feeling chastened as I write this but I really do have a short attention span AND I will ignore that bunch above on the next one and include you, I will really.... But before I go can I make one more final special mention and you will understand why after saying no more, why I do for this one and it's for LESLEY

Yes you, Lesley Scott, one of my adorable nieces.  Lesley can be found on Twitter at https://twitter.com/grouchymonsta and on her blog at http://clichesandcatastrophes.blogspot.co.uk/ Unfortunately for us the wee monkey doesn't post very often, IN FACT IT HAS BEEN OVER A YEAR NOW, SHEESH but, she really should she has such a way with language and in describing the insane workings of her twenty something mind that one of these days I am sure she will going from being a beauty therapist to being one of our finest comedy stage performers and or writers. There is a wee collection of her stuff over at her post, it is worth checking her out and while there, tell her to start writing again, we the public deserve to read her and there is no point in hiding your light under a bushel (what the hell is a bushel, BTW?) But get out from under whatever it is Lesley and Post, post post.......





Rules for the BEST MOMENT AWARD:  1. These nominees (now winners) repost these rules completely after their acceptance speech. 2. Winners now have the privilege of awarding the next awardees! The re-post should include a Thank You for those who helped them, a NEW list of people and blogs worthy of the award (up to 15), and the winners posted here will then notify their choices with the great news of receiving this special award.    Download the award's logo at MomentMatters.com/Award and post it with your acceptance.

Is it me? Part I

Be gentle with me, this is my first attempt at blogging and it is, hopefully, going to be my way to get a few things off my chest that are bothering me or that I see and maybe want to comment on or things that I, but maybe not you, find funny or humorous, so, here goes ...


Is it me? The sun is shining its a glorious day.. Young women are wearing short skirts and keep tugging them down to preserve their modesty and young men who look like complete TITS with the gusset of their jeans down to their knees keep pulling them up as they fall to their ankles...... is it me ?

Is it me? Part III

The sun is shining its a glorious day.. Young women are wearing short skirts and keep tugging them down to preserve their modesty and young men who look like complete TITS with the gusset of their jeans down to their knees keep pulling them up as they fall to their ankles...... is it me ?


I mean what is the point of wearing a skirt so short that you feel so uncomfortable that you have to keep tugging it down, I have two daughters and a son and two nieces.  Of the daughters one does wear short skirts and the other is a jeans 'mom'. My two nieces are, well my two nieces, and they will hit me if I say anything about them or worse still berate me publicly on 'facebook' and talking off...  if  'facebook' for my youngest and my two little darlings from the frozen north, was a skirt, it should be getting tugged down with regular frequency!


If you are old enough to remember the parody of the way some cowboys used to walk in films and on TV, with the exaggerated bent leg walk you will know what I am talking about when it comes to the boys.  Why do they do that, surely even young women walking behind them and seeing that awful picture of bow legs and the bum of the jeans looking as if they had just done a dump in them must surely be off putting, and they keep tugging them up like the skirts, but not far enough.... 

Perfect Beef Casserole with Mushrooms

decided to make a Beef casserole today with Mushrooms.

Took One punnet of large chestnut mushrooms cut into quarters and added to hot pan with large dollop of butter.

Added: finely chopped red peppers, chilli, Garlic, Mint, Coriander and some dried tomatoes.

Crushed some Cumin and Carraway seeds cracked black pepper, sea salt   Paprika  and some Brown sugar and finished off with some dried rose petals

Sweated it all down in the butter and added a few dried rose petals

Set aside once cooked and mushrooms tender.


Beef:  Has been marinading in Worcester sauce red wine, cornflour and Paprika with salt and pepper and any dried herbs that take your fancy.

Nice hot pan and some oil: Brown of the meat in batches, not to much in the pan at one time and don't worry about the pan sticking, it tends to do this when you are browning off meat with cornflour, reduce the heat if need be.

Remove each batch of meat once browned.

Once all the meat is browned , pour in half a bottle of nice red wine and begin  to de-glaze the bottom of the pan and get all those bits of it but leave them in.  Add the meat and the mushrooms back to the pan and bring to a quick boil on the hob to burn of the alcohol.  Turn off the heat Boil the kettle and top up the casserole with boiling water. Add a couple of bay leaves.

Place in oven at 50 to 100 degrees and slow cook for a couple of hours and I guarantee you will have the tenderest casserole EVER

Sorry that there are no measurements, never use them I just add what I think will go well together and taste as I go along, usually works for me......

The whole thing took about 35 mins to prepare, cook on the hob until ready to go into the oven

Beef and Mushroom Casserole

Dear Amazon Kindle

My wife bought me a Kindle as a Christmas Gift last year .  I bought her a tablet for her birthday and she has downloaded the Kindle app to it and in a couple of weeks has already got a dozen books on it.  One of our children also has a kindle as does her husband.  We, and our daughter and her Husband have  hundreds of 'written' books and we regularly borrow books from each other.

Once we purchase a book we are pretty much free to do with them what we want, including lending to friends and family or giving them away!

The one thing, and it is the only thing that does bug me with my Kindle is, that if any of us in the family circle buy a book, unless we are prepared to borrow the device from the other family member, that's if they would allow us to borrow it, which even in my close family is doubtful and impracticable, we cannot 'borrow' the book to read and we then have to 'purchase it all over again'.

This is something that surely Amazon can resolve by setting up a separate section in the manage Kindle page where family members can be linked and books shared!

I look forward to your comments on this.

Regards

UPDATE

This is the reply that I received.  Now 10 out of 10 for the fairly quick response, but what they are effectively saying, unless I am reading it wrongly,  is, that if, as a family you are going to have multiple Kindles or you are going to download the app to your tablet or phone,  then you should register them under one user and of course that means one credit/bank account for all purchases!  Now I love my daughter and my wife but I refuse to pay for every single book that they might want to buy and I suspect that they would feel the same, and why should we.

They do say however, that, "we look forward to offering this feature in the future."  But, how long is a piece of string, so I find that part of the reply unsatisfactory.  I am no technophile, but I would have thought that this is something that they would be capable of putting into effect fairly easily, even if it was a simple case of the original purchaser of the book flagging it in the 'manage your kindle' area of the site with the name and email address of the family member who can access it on their device.  Amazon could then send a message to family member B stating that family member A has made one of their books available for transfer to their device, or am I just being to simplistic?

Hello Tom,

I understand your concern in this regard.

Lending of Kindle books is not yet available for Kindle or Kindle reading applications on Amazon.co.uk. We look forward to offering this feature in the future.

I am extremely sorry for the disappointment and inconvenience caused.

One of our aims is to provide a convenient and efficient service and I realise that we have not met that standard in this case. Please accept our apologies.

Customer feedback like yours helps us continue to improve the service and products we provide, and we are glad you took time to write to us. I have sent your comments to the business team.

Please feel free to forward further comments and suggestions about Kindle to kindle-feedback@amazon.co.uk . Each suggestion will be read and taken into consideration.

However, if you wish you can register multiple Kindle devices under your Amazon.co.uk account.

That means you can download and read your books on multiple Kindle devices as long you've registered each device to the Amazon.co.uk account where your Kindle library is stored. All available content will appear in the Archived Items of each device/app.

You can see all your Kindle content and send downloads to your registered Kindles or Kindle applications from the "Your Orders" section of the Manage Your Kindle page www.amazon.co.uk/manageyourkindle.

There is no limit on the number of times Kindle content can be downloaded to a registered Kindle device or application. Publishers determine how many copies of each title can be downloaded to different Kindle devices or applications at the same time so there may be limits on the number of devices (usually six) that can simultaneously have a single book or Kindle active content title. If the limit is less than six Kindles for a specific title, you'll see the message "Simultaneous Device usage: Up to X simultaneous devices, per publisher limits" on the website detail page. Currently Kindle subscriptions cannot be automatically delivered to the Home Screen of more than one device. You can download your Kindle subscription to another device from the Archived Items on that Kindle if both devices are registered to the same account.

The options for transferring content, and instructions for each option, are available in our Help pages here:

www.amazon.co.uk/kindletransfer

I hope this information helps.

Thank you for your interest in Kindle.

Did I solve your problem?

If yes, please click here:
http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/help/survey?p=A1MF1P5LQV74J3&k=hy

If no please click here
http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/help/survey?p=A1MF1P5LQV74J3&k=hn

To contact us about an unrelated issue, please visit the Help section of our website: http://www.amazon.co.uk/help

Warmest regards,


Balaji B.
Amazon.co.uk
Your feedback is helping us build Earth's Most Customer-Centric Company.

---- Original message: ----

Perfection is a dish self served!

As you go about your day and your life do you often wonder at the number of people who are critical of you and or others?

If you say or write something and maybe your grammar was a little bit off or your spelling of a particular word was incorrect someone seems to be waiting to pounce on you and correct your mistake, why?

I am not a perfectionist, in anything I do. Pedantic and sometimes Bloody Minded in some things and areas maybe, but perfectionist, no, not really.

Now, don't get me wrong, I really don't get upset when others point out my shortcomings, after all, I have spent a long time 'perfecting' them or as some might say, stumbling (or bumbling as others might say)  along in a perpetual state of ignorance, oblivious in most instances to what I have said or done wrong or where my grammar has maybe given an entirely different meaning to what I have written than what I apparently actually meant to say!

It just seems that with the advent of social media that more and more people are becoming critics, well of course I am one myself, you only need read some of my offerings to see that I am ready to criticise others! But, my criticisms are levelled at other things, the system of government, the state of the NHS, parliamentary expenses, the unfairness of life, etc.  And not at the individual, well maybe some individuals in public life for what they have said or done that I fundamentally disagree with.

I follow a number of people on social networks, primarily on Twitter some of whom I engage with some I don't.  And it is interesting to see the number of, in many instances, one sided tweets that appear on my timeline with someone of note whom I follow (now should that have been who or whom - do feel free to correct me, I really don't mind!) in response to something they have written that they then clearly have had a response from someone else who follows them correcting their grammatical or spelling mistake (!) and they, the corrected  and offended, do seem to take umbrage, judging by some of the withering responses that appear.

Also, it is correct to point out, I think, that some do point out little mistakes because they do know the author and do it humorously, as opposed to humourlessly, or just to wind their friend up and that is also fine too, .... but criticism for the sake of trying to appear better educated or more informed than the author of the item being commented on, no point really... don't you think?

Sweets are better than Chocolate

This is why sweets are bad for you!

Mr Cadbury met Miss Rowntree on a Double Decker.  It was just After Eight.  They got of at Quality Street.

He asked her name, "Polo", she replied, " I'm the one with the hole", she said with a Whispa.

"I'm Marathon, the one with the Nuts", he replied.  He touched her Cream Eggs then slipped his hand into her Snickers.  He fondled her Flap Jacks and she rubbed his Tic Tacs.  It was a Fab moment as she screamed in Turkish Delight. But three days later his Sherbet Dib Dab started to itch.

Turns out Miss Rowntree had been with Bertie Bassett and he had Allsorts!

Author unknown but thanks to Nick for sending it to me......

What I would do in A Second Life -By Mollie Ing aged 8 1/4

     If I had a Second Life I would make it last and make it fun like every one should and you have to be grateful for yourself even if something bad happens like someone passes away or you lose you most special thing.

     You should always be grateful that's my first reason now all you should know now is you should be grateful. but I shall tell you what I would do, I would spend time with my family most of the time ,but I WOULD go to the park and go outside the front with my friends twice a week.  That,s who I would spend time with if I had a second life.  

me, rubbing garlic and herbs that I prepard in a mortar and
pestle before rubbing it in my leg of lamb

Now I shall tell you what I have been up to tonight .Tonight for my dinner I am having roast lamb and I helped prepare it so in a second life I might be a chef.  Also in a second life I would allways make my dinners sea food like sqid and stuff like that.  In a second life if I was the qeen I would make smokeing band forever and homework band forever .now I would like to tell what pets I would have in a second life.now here they are I would love a hamster because my friend millie has one called bert and I really like so I would like a hamster in a second life.


AND IN MY SECOND LIFE EVERYTHING WILL BE SPLENDID.

What would you do with a Second Life

I have a 'Twitter Friend' who goes by the name of @EmmaGerain, this is her twitter picture or Avatar.
Now, I suspect like most Tweeters, Emma and I have never met but we comment on each others tweets if each of us say something that interests us or that we find funny or disturbing or we just plain 'hate'.  Hate as in the sense that it makes us want to shout at it, them, the situation, or whatever.

Now I have no idea who found who and who befriended whom first, but that is really not important.  Emma, and I have no idea if that is her real name or not, I have discovered, is a "Second Lifer". No, that does not mean that she is hiding behind a made up picture because she is a mass murderer, well at least I do not think she is, or that she is serving consecutive life sentences behinds bars in Holloway Prison.  No it means that she is a part of a community who meet on line in a virtual reality.

Wikipedia describes it thus:

Second Life is an online virtual world developed by Linden Lab. It was launched on June 23, 2003. A number of free client programs, or Viewers^[1][2], enable Second Life users, called Residents, to interact with each other through avatars. Residents can explore the world (known as the grid), meet other residents, socialize, participate in individual and group activities, and create and trade virtual property and services with one another. Second Life is intended for people aged 16 and over^[3], and as of 2011 has about one million active users^[4].

I see Tweets from Emma from time to time advertising that she is DJing at SL and inviting people to pop along to listen to her set and this morning she posted a short blog on SL at Emma's Blog.

I visited, I read and I didn't understand a word of what she was twittering on about, but that is me.  But, it also got me to thinking, "What would you do with a Second Life in real life"?

Would, if you were married, for instance,(and please do remember Ishbel Stronach, this is a work of fiction and not my desire) you have a Second Life as a single club loving partying, socialite?  Where once or twice a week you could slip out and let your hair down, on your own!

Would you get the wife to do her own ironing? (threat last night unless her behaviour improved)

Or, if you were stuck in a boring office job would you have a Second Life as a high flyer or an entrepreneurial wizard with everything you touch turning to financial gold?

On the other hand, if you were a high powered boss in stressful meetings every day would your Second Life  be that of a stay at home parent taking the kids to school and out walking with the dogs?

Or if you are a blogger would your Second Life have you as a successful author?

Just what would you be in your Second Life?

My Office Entrance Step

One of the problems we have in the office I manage, it is a multi tenanted building, is the number of people who sit on the entrance step to eat their fast food, drink and have a fag, or just plain loitering some are recidivists and need a good slap so here are my solutions:

In no particular order

1. Install a small sprinkler system above the step when they sit or loiter, press button to activate!
2. There are 3 grooves in the step with a thin metal strip, wire the metal strips up to the power, when they sit down, switch on!
3. Every time they sit down send the cleaner out with bucket of water and mop!
4. Tell them to GTF off the step and plank their lazy asses on the street bench opposite the door! 

I favour 1 and 2 any other suggestions?

Is 3D printing heralding further losses in Manufacturing Jobs and Will this lead to more Social Unrest in the Future?

I have posted a number of links at the end of this article to some sites where you can see what they are doing now, at the beginning of this 'new' technology.  And as I was looking through them last week, in between digesting all the news of the riots and their aftermath I started to think what 3D printing might do in relation to the job markets across the world!

One of the issues that people have said about the rioters, including me, is that they are an 'underclass' within society, created because they have been left in a financial wilderness by politicians because they either will not work or they cannot work or they do not have the skills or the education to allow them to work.

Another reason has also been that there has been a steady downturn in the number of manufacturing jobs available to the population as a whole over the last 40 years and it seems to me that the small number of jobs still available, may well get even smaller with the advent of this technology as it becomes increasingly available to the manufacturing industry.  Or will it?

Lets face it, there is no point in manufacturing goods if no one has the money to buy them and if the masses are unable to go out to work to earn money, who, other than those who are already rich will be able to afford to buy anything.  And while we recognise that there are more and more rich people in the world surely these are always going to be outnumbered by the clamouring classes who are poor!

When I was growing up in my hometown of Coatbridge in Scotland it was expected, no, it was known, that I would end up in one of the many steel works or knitwear factories that the town was famous for.  I know there were dozens of them, because I trawled around most of them as a kid with my home made cart with bottle crates on them asking the workers for their empty pop bottles, which I could then take to the shop and claim the refund, between that and biking between weddings for the 'scramble' on Saturday mornings was a great (and most times) the only source of pocket money we had, as we were an economically (not deprived) challenged family.  But as I got closer and closer to 15 and leaving school all these factories and steel works started to close down in the late 60's heading into the 70's and for many like me, there were only two ways you could go, Military Service or the Dole. I chose the former , but many of my peers chose the latter and the downward spiral into alcoholism as a bottle of Buckie was relatively cheap and as I understand it today there is as much controversy around it now as there was then!

So, will manufacturers adopt the new technology or will they be bribed by governments not to?  Or will they recognise that if there are no people in jobs and earning money to buy the goods that they produce, then there is little point in adopting it?  Only time is going to answer those questions but it may be time we haven't got judging by the riots and the comments from the "I want" brigade who instead of continuing to say "I Want" are now going out and becoming criminal arsonists who are prepared to now "just take" what they want and damn the consequences!

Have a look at the links below, surely it is only a matter of time now before these machines are super sized and developed to the stage where they can produce fully working parts and full size bits of cars and machines and surely will not be good for those employed directly in manufacturing, the economy and all peoples while we still rely on a monetary driven society?

 What do you think?

Best Wishes

Wikipedia    3D Ball Bearings  3D Motorcycle Aeroplane created using a 3D printer in world first: Scientists create aircraft with 100mph max speed | Mail Online  3D body Parts

Should Virtual Suicide Be Outlawed? | Future Crimes | Big Think

Should Virtual Suicide Be Outlawed? | Future Crimes | Big Think

Interesting article by the Blog Big Think on virtual suicide.  Not something I have considered, virtual or otherwise.  Although I have said to Ishbel on many an occasion as we have watched programmes or read articles about people who are terminally ill, or who have had an accident and they become incapable of looking after themselves, that that situation for me would be intolerable and that I would just want to die either by having medical care withdrawn or having the plug pulled on life support.

But what was more interesting for me in this article was the sub content that Facebook were trying to bully, through a legal letter, Moddr who are  offering people the software to carry out their virtual suicide and destroy all links with the social network sites they are signed into.

  The virtual suicide machine launches a series of scripts which Moddr.Net has created which log into various social networking sites and deletes all network contacts.  In addition, the script blocks further access to the account by changing the prior password and by not providing the new login credentials to the individual committing virtual suicide.

Why then are Facebook so exercised about this programme, well in the words of one executive;

  a Facebook executive noted his vision was for everybody on earth to have a Facebook account. 

As the author of the Big Think  Blog goes on to say;

Consider the implications.  In effect, Facebook will become the default global citizen database.  Those that did not participate would become non-existent in the eyes of the world, an act akin to committing “social suicide” as one researcher in the UK has commented.  Advocates and frequent users of Web 2.0 have even commented that they would not trust somebody who did not have a Facebook account.

The article goes on to inform us that incitement to commit suicide in the real world, in many countries, is an offence and I can understand the reasons for that.  For example, I suppose, where you have someone in a family who holds the purse strings, but for whatever reason has become mentally impaired and rather than kill him or her and run the risk of being caught and sent down for murder, people could be tempted to Chinese whisper that person into killing themselves.  Again there is clearly a risk of being caught, but much lesser than if you were to carry out an actual murder. So, it is right and proper that incitement to suicide should be an offence in a socially aware society.

But, is it really right that a company like Facebook threatens a company with dire legal consequences, for providing software to people who might otherwise want to get out of their social networks and with the contacts therein but may not have the willpower to actually do it, without the push.  Maybe people like that do exist, and it may be that it could be argued if they are in that position with their 'on-line self and or avatar' then they could be as vulnerable in the real world.  But I do not think that Facebook are doing it with any sense of social or moral  superiority, do you?

I have a confession here, I confess I do not know why sites like Facebook and Twitter or Linkedin seem to be worth as much as they are quoted to be.  They are free to join and they don't charge you once you are a member.  I am a spectacle wearer and apparently I am going deaf, my super hero alter ego tag is Mr Fat, but other than all that I think I am in fairly good condition, but don't ask me to undertake a medical as it may dispel my own belief in my own well being; and that wouldn't be good.  But the point is and I have just checked my Facebook, Twitter and Pushnote pages and I really don't see any adverts aimed at me or anyone else for that matter.  So why are these companies worth so much. Did I just read this week that some Russian oligarch had just invested $300 million dollars in Twitter? Why?

So if Facebook already has 850 million users world wide, why does it matter if a couple of hundred thousand commit mass 'virtual suicide' to rid themselves of their on-line persona.

I know that many are critical of it. I have been in the past and I am sure I will be again in the future.  Maybe I am one of those people who might be vulnerable to be pushed into this 'virtual suicide' as it was pressure (gentle as it was) from my peers in the form of my wife and youngest daughter, Jennifer, that 'pushed' me into opening  a Facebook account.  I also confess here that I am not a habitual user of it.  Rather I am a tweeter and while I have tweeted in excess of 2000 tweets a high proportion of them are re-tweets from people I follow who have infinitely more interesting things to say than I have. Or, they are links to Blogs like Big Think or a young chap Callum Jones who is also a blogger and much more eloquent and erudite than I and usually has interesting things to say, even although he is still just a 'spotty' kid(!) who still has to find life in all its glory. And it is my tweets that form the bulk of my posts on Facebook as I discovered that these forums can be linked.

So, is there an underlying threat to us all from Facebook that they will go to these lengths and threats against this company who are giving people the means to clear social media from their lives and to get back to the real world? Have Facebook and Twitter got secret plans to suddenly charge us all a monthly fee to be part of the 'virtual world' and therefore anything that is going to allow us to opt out must be met with a battery of high priced and high profile litigators?

Or is it that we put so much information on these sites that they 'sell that information' to third parties who can then target us through other mediums to purchase their goods and services and is that where these companies are making their money, I have no idea what the reasons are, but it all seems more than a little odd.

Finally, The question was should Virtual Suicide be Outlawed? Answer: I have no idea, but lean towards No. but what do you think?

Best Wishes  

Amid The Market Carnage, Apple's The New King -But is it digging its own grave?

Amid The Market Carnage, Apple's The New King - Yahoo! UK & Ireland Finance

As of last night, Apple was valued at a cool $337 billion, trumping the oil giant ExxonMobil at $331 billion. Other companies in the mega-cap list include:

Petrochina - $277 billion

Industrial (Mexico: ST2000.MX - news) and Commercial Bank of China - $226 billion

Nestle (BSE: NESTLE.BO - news) - $217 billion

Microsoft - $203 billion

This story got me to thinking about video recorders, whhhaaaat? I here you say, in fact some of you reading this probably don't even know what a video recorder is, or care for that matter.

But for those of us who do, do you also recall that there were two systems, Betamax and VHS and of the fight for survival between the two.  Now if you look at the links for both you will see that Betamax comes out on top as the better system, technically, but clearly with drawbacks as described in the articles, and this is where VHS won the battle.  But the battle wasn't just one of technical superiority, as I recall. There was also a cost implication for most people.  As home video took of in the UK in the early 80's to buy a recorder of any description was one that had  to be looked at as a major luxury item.  I wasn't long out of the Army and I recall my first job was as a warranty administrator for a commercial garage and my take home wage was circa £75.00 after tax, etc., per week.  So just under £4k a year.  Video machines were on sale (and for rent) for anything from £300+ to £600+, so, as you can see, while desirable, one of these machines was way down the order in terms of things that we needed, but really wanted!

Interestingly while looking at this I found this blog that looks at all things 80's and there was also an article on videos recorders as well, here for your delectation is the link 1980s-coming-to-your-home-vcr

So, what is the link between Apple today and video recorders of the 1980's, well, maybe none, but it got my thinking going of again in a lateral direction, as I usually do with these things.  Today, as in the 1980's I am working and as in the 1980's I do not earn a big wage and while Ishbel and I have been left to fend for ourselves by our children, who have grown up and gone on to have families of their own with no consideration to looking after us any more (only kidding), we still don't have that much money to throw around.  Now being a bit of a technophobe, in that I like to own gadgets, but can't always afford them, I have and do, on a regular basis, pop in to the local Apple shop and drool over the sleek lines of the ipods and ipads, and macs, but I have never bought one.  My kids have, (hate them) but I haven't. Ishbel wanted one as she travels around on the train to visit the kids mid week when she isn't working, but ended up with Creative's Vision M  mp3 player .  Having listened both to the ipod and the vision M I believe that the latter is every bit as good as the former.  What drove me to that was nothing more than price, but since she got it about 4 years ago now, it has let us down only once.  It was popped into a box sent back to Ireland and a replacement was sent by return, and that has functioned without problem ever since.


So, quality, of product, quality of sound and size of memory cannot be faulted.  Compared to and iPod, well I can't really but I wouldn't change from Creative to Apple for those reasons mentioned and also for price.  Sure Creative have much more expensive products as well but they are well below the price of Apples stable of gadgets and this is where I think Apple may well be digging there own grave ahead of toppling in to it!


Apple are now the most valued company on the planet and they have achieved that by building and selling what is unquestionably quality merchandise.  But how can they justify the continued high prices that they continue to maintain, especially as, a) we have been told since Adam was a boy that the more of a product that is produced the lower the cost, doesn't seem to be the case with Apple though does it? And, b) we know that the vast majority of their products are built using what one would loosely term as 'cheap labour, in the far east and China,  Again then the question has to be asked how they can continue to justify the continued high prices?


But the final spadeful of dirt being dug out of that hole that they may well get buried in surely has to be the Android operating system. As well as the report that Apple is now the most profitable company on the planet we learn that Smart phones and other gadgets containing the Android OS are outselling Apple by two to 1 across the world.  As I said I do not have an iPhone and nor does Ishbel.  I have an HTC and Ishbel has a Samsung Galaxy S.  We both 'love' these phones, although I am a late entrant to the smart phone market, I wouldn't want to do without it now. On the other hand for our daughter's, Marie, who swears by her iPhone and Jennifer is counting down the 'sleeps' until she gets her new iPhone, but Brian, our son, who according to Ishbel, 'gets more like his dad' everyday to the riposte, 'Oh shut up, mum!' also swears by his HTC.


The point of all this is of course, that Apple, like windows before them have a virtual monopoly on their OS system and will not share.  They continue to charge premium prices in every country they operate in and while we all might aspire to own an Apple gadget, it is always going to be out of the reach of many more than it sells to.  On the other hand Android is in everything else from the cheap and gaudy to the, 'as expensive as an Apple' and can much better supply more economical gadgets to the masses around the globe.  Surely this has to be a warning to Apple to change their strategy and make their product less elitist! 
  

My Sunday .........

Sunday 7th August

Had a long lie in today, unintended but welcome.

10 AM  When I did eventually surface Ishbel was in the bedroom putting the finishing touches to 'her face' so clearly had been there for a while..................

Anyway, as she was working I thought I had better get my skates on, quick wash, dressed and maybe a bit of toast before taking her to work, then I could get back do a quick tidy up and maybe get in a walk before Jennifer, Steve and the grand daughters, Hollie, Mollie, Shannon and Lacey Mae arrive.

10.45 AM Left to take Ishbel to work, threw her out of the car just as Donny Osmond was about to start singing 'Love Me for a Reason', close call see previous blog Musical-reflections-and-i-still-hate-the-Osmonds

11.10 AM back in the house and tidying up, headphones to hand for plugging into HTC smart phone so that I can listen to the new series on Radio 4 'The Reunion' bringing back together that awful man Nick Leason who caused the collapse of Barrings bank, and his old boss (now need to listen to it on the iPlayer later)

11.12 AM Unexpected phone call from work.  Duty chap bleeding from mouth.  I know the other two are busy so decide to go in and relieve him myself.  Tell him I will be in in half an hour.

Empty pockets of shorts I was wearing and head upstairs to change.

Return downstairs and refill pockets.  Decide to finish tidying kitchen and phone Jennifer to see what time they are arriving, no worries not till later and they have a key (what!)

Pick up kitchen waste to put in the three separate bins outside front door, will come back for my satchel with all my bits and bobs in it, you know all the essential stuff that a man about town needs;  Keys to the office, (do I still remember the security codes for the alarms for locking up later as I have not been called out or locked up in about six years?), Kindle, Camera, book of poetry, various leads and attachments for HTC and Samsung phones, USB portable hard drive and cables, Anadin Extra in case I get a headache, assorted coloured pens, bottle of water, assorted notebooks, cheque books and, lumps of gathered lint, etc.. etc.. etc..

Open front door and go to bins, door closes behind me, not a problem as I refilled my pockets........

Discover pockets refilled, but key to front door and car not there, AGAIN

Now at this point, if I have not already mentioned it I do suffer slightly, in that I forget things, not seriously forgetting by way of a a disease, at least I don't thinks so, but little forgetful things, particularly names and more particularly KEYS.

The office crew, as I am on my way out the door most nights will, if they do not forget, ask me if I have everything, Phone, camera , KEYS, head,  the last one I think is just a note of sarcasm creeping in but the penultimate one is of course the kicker and of particular importance particularly if I have got the train into work that day  as it would not be the first time when I have left the office, got home and found that I have left the keys in the office!!!!!!

So you can see, it is not highly unusual for me to be in this predicament, bur of course I have a bleeding colleague on my hands on this occasion.  What to do, I can't go over to the neighbour and get Arron, the son to climb over the back fence and in through the usual open window as I clearly recall closing that and anyway Sunday morning football has started again and their car wasn't there, so they were probably out.

Phoned Mani and told him he would need to wait for an hour as I needed to do something, hung up, and called a taxi, "Sorry nothing available for at least an hour".  Bit the bullet and phoned Sharon, explained situation with Mani and asked if she could go in for a couple of hours,  I usually insist that the office is open till 4 pm on a Sunday but told her if she could go in she could close it at 2 and I would pay her for a days shift, problem solved......

11.30 Now what, Oh well nothing for it better grab a bus and head in to Lakeside and get the house key from Ishbel!  Went to bus stop, Sunday Service bus not due for another 45 minutes.  Walkie time after all.  

Sun was shining but not to warm so off I start, bump into, not literally, a chap walking along the road with a Sainsbury carrier bag in each hand, comment that, "you look like a nice well balanced chap!" looked at me strangely, well by then I was in a strange place!

As I walked along in the sunshine with a slight breeze blowing west to east, ok if you insist right to left. There was clear blue sky's with little wispy clouds, but as I turned to my right and looked towards London there was the blackest cloud you could imagine with what looked like, and soon proved to be, a curtain of rain in front of it.  By this time, 12.40 ish I had been cracking on but knew I was not going to make Lakeside by the time it hit me.  I didn't but I was 5 minutes from the M25 roundabout just before Lakeside so managed to take some cover under there, not that it mattered to much as I was already bedraggled.

It's amazing what a heavy rain shower does, especially if it is followed by glorious sunshine.

  The leaves and the berries on the trees are hanging heavily towards the ground

   The weight of the water, as it makes it way down the branches onto the leaves and berries

    drips drips down onto the already sodden ground.

     The pavements and roads are washed clean and the sunshine sparkling on the ponds of water,

       left behind after the torrent, are sparkling in the sunshine that follows.

          It just makes the place look as if it has just been through a car wash, all clean and fresh ready to

             take on the dust and grime thrown at it by each passing vehicle until the next shower comes

along  

.13.05 Made it to Debenhams and retrieved key, just got a shake of the head now as this is an intermittent but usual occurrence.  Choice now was to walk home or wait 45 minutes for a bus.  Although the sun was shining rain clouds were scudding across and this was the pattern for the rest of the day.  Elected to wait the 45 minutes and get the bus.

Went in to Waterstones and had a browse at the books and got myself a David Baldacci 'The Sixth Man'.  Have heard good things about Mr Baldacci so will look forward to reading that..

Bus duly arrived, although  a few minutes late.  Not been on a 22 for a while but the driver is one of those old guys that is hard to forget.  He always has something cheery to say to everyone who gets on or off his bus.  Even the two young females who barged there way past people to ask him if he was going to Dartford?

Now, how they got here from Dartford is a mystery, or maybe they didn't, for as far as I knew and confirmed by the driver a few moments later, no he didn't go to Dartford and neither did any of the buses from here go to Dartford. Dartford is South of the river Thames in Kent and while their used to be a bus that went South over the QE2 bridge there hasn't been one for a couple of years, well at least not from Lakeside.!

14.30 hrs Got home and had a cool drink and woke up the PC and decided to write about my forgetfulness before starting to prepare Sunday lunch, which was going to be chicken casserole, with carrots, broccoli and cauliflower, as usual turned out well and everyone enjoyed.

Mind you as I was writing this the laptop crashed.  This one is a Vista and although everyone is either still on XP or upgraded to Win7, this one has been really reliable and has never crashed, not once, before.  It took 3 system restores, and a get rid of Google chrome, before it would work properly again, so I am hoping that it has just been a 'black Sunday, fitting in with my key aberration of earlier .

Kids have been sitting watching Spiderman and Free Willy2, whatever that is, I didn't even know there was a Free Willy 1?

So, that's about it for my day, started with a pleasant and unplanned lie in moving on to locking myself out, getting caught in a downpour and my laptop crashing on me, but Jennifer, Steve and the girls turned up and apart from Jennifer being her usual fruitcake youngest child  self has rounded the day of nicely

Sp whatever your Sunday brought I hope if it was annoying as mine in the middle, that it turned out well with welcome visitors , in the end....................

Best Wishes   

My Office

My Office, this is where they stick me each day to sort out the problems encountered by the tenants and visitors to the Centre!

It's also where I keep up to date with the Navy Lark, The Archers, The Men from the Ministry and all the other radio programmes on Radio 4 and Radio 4 Extra 

 It is here where I email, write letters and generally make a nuisance of myself to both tenants, visitors and the powers that be!

 It's full of junk, including me......

It's hot in summer and in winter and sometimes it gets the occasional visitor and indeed one recently left a bottle of malt on my desk!

Parking, no problem unless you overstay your welcome and your welcome may be as long as I am in a good mood..............

Best Wishes 

From Parachutes to Shootings to Polyps and Beyond......

I was late going in to work today because I had a doctors appointment, unusual, as I am one of THOSE MEN who rarely visits the doctor, even when I am dying.  No seriously I am, and I am not in the position of dying very often, or at least if I am, I tend to make miraculous recoveries and I am off and running, well not physically you understand, see Mr Fat and the Exerciser and you will understand why.  No, more a metaphorical running, running in ones mind, and getting back to the business of doing what I do best, which if truth be told is not a lot, no, don't laugh it's true.

Seriously I really do need to be dying or incapable of moving before I will visit the Doctor and in some cases the Doctor even needs to come to me.

1974 small problem with a parachute, it didn't open, but hey, these things happen all the time, I am sure I heard in the background chatter this morning about a young lady who also survived when her chutes did not open over the weekend, see, no big deal.  Anyway the other strange thing about my chute not opening all those years ago, was, as I was hurtling to my doom, I thought I had already died with a heart attack and gone to heaven, as I suddenly heard the skirl of the pipes, Scottish or pretend Scottishness or ancient ancestry of Scottishness, may explain that...... if not, another time.  Anyway that was one of those occasions when the doctor came to me, a sort of house call in a forest, who jumps out of a plane over a forest, not bloody me, so don't go there; wind, wind wind...  And do you know what the first thing this Doctor said to me, "Well mate, let's have a look at you, but I can tell already theirs f**k all wrong with your lungs." "What, the F**k" I thought, here I am lying in a heap, no feeling to most of my body, almost suffocating  engulfed in yards of nylon and this tit is suggesting I screamed like a baby, if only I could have moved, I would have smacked him one in the chops and it would have been him needing to self medicate! Any way long story short after being needled by SS, Sister Slattery one to many times I finally, after about 6 months tried to walk and attempted to get my hands round her throat, but realising that I was suddenly walking after all these months, I collapsed in a heap in the middle of the floor, only to have SS come back, nudge me with her toe and say, "See, you little Scots git, I told you you could walk, now get yourself back into bed and I'll call the doctor."

Between then and 1977, there were a couple of other minor incidents that required some attention and medication but nothing too much to worry about.

Then in 1977, as I recall I was in Central America, and again I have made reference in other blogs to how fit and healthy I was and that I enjoyed running and exercise, but on this particular day I discovered that it may be good enough for superman to out run a speeding train and to stop a bullet, well I can't testify to the former, but as to the latter, well, I wasn't superman and so I could not stop a speeding bullet, you do see where this is going don't you?  I am determined not to visit the doctor if I can help it, they MUST be brought to me first, and here we go again, some b****rd shot me.  Mind you I didn't even realise it had happened.  The adrenalin was going like a good un, and it was only when I dived into some cover to return  fire, that I brought my trusty old SelfLoadingRifle or SLR up into the firing position that I curiously noted that it wasn't there.  Now that was curious,  here I was out leading a patrol, come under fire take cover and I've lost my bloody rifle, that's going to go down well with the powers that be and the other chaps in the patrol, where the f**k was it?     It was then that I noticed a small red spot in the middle of the palm of my hand,  now word of warning here to anyone who might be in a similar situation to this.  If you see a small red spot in the middle of the palm of your hand, DO NOT TURN YOUR HAND OVER TO LOOK AT THE BACK OF YOUR HAND!

Because if you do, you may get the fright of your life.... As I turned my hand over there was no small spot there was a massive f****ng hole there was blood, there was bone, there was bits of skin and then there was of course my spittle as I started to dribble, but then there was the message!  What message, you ask?  Well have you ever been in a situation which is a bit dodgy and you eyes are trying to send a message to your brain to say sort of, " Hey, Brain, Eyes here, if you can see what I can see, should you not be sending a little all points bulletin out as a little warning to avoid this hazard or obstacle?" But, you know sometimes the brain and the eyes react quite differently to certain things, and where one sees something and sends a message back, the interpretation of the message is not quite what you expect,  although I am still not sure what one should expect.  Anyway, so my eyes see this gaping hole in the back of the hand and sends that image to my brain, and what does the brain do, well yes, it does send a message out, and I'll bet you can guess by now what that message was!  No, it wasn't, "Oh my, that looks interesting", or "Oh my word, now there is something that the eyes don't show me very often", No this message was kinda like, "What the F**k is going on here, is that part of this numptys body that I look after and I am supposed to keep safe, good f****ing god, that looks pretty painful, Oh, I know he isn't doing much but just staring at it, let's see if this gets a reaction" Now you do understand that this is all taking place in milliseconds.  I see it, the brain sees it, does a quick calculation and then sends out its all points bulletin to every fibre and nerve ending that was left or in bits down in the location of my right hand saying, "It's f***ing sore, shout, scream, tell them you want your mummy", hang on I didn't say that, (Brain, "other parts of your mind may be going south, but I remember, you shouted on your mummy, there are witnesses") Well I still reckon that it was something that sounded like mummy...

Anyway, moving on, before my brain takes over again, you will notice that I am once again in a little predicament where the medics come to me first, see, I really don't want to be the first to blink. and so medics attend helo called and of I am carted to hospital.  In short order I am then casevacd to UK and the Military Hospital in Woolwich, which is now an NHS hospital, cos we don't need any military hospitals cos we don't have any wounded or dying or maimed servicemen, (brain, "Save it for another rant"), and who do you think is the ward sister, yes good old SS, Sister Slattery, and she remembered me, I wonder why as I tend to think of myself as a bit of a wallflower, no really, I am.......

Nearly forgot and it was that bloody author Michael R Hicks, you know the one, him that has written that series of books that once you start reading that you just can't stop until you get to the end, yes that'shim, he's the one, entitled In Her Name anyway that got me remembering about this one.

I used to suffer from sinusitis but didn't realise it and I hadn't thought about it for years.  He mentioned in one of his tweets on twitter @KreelanWarrior that he was having a bit of a sinus problem and lo and behold, I start getting  psychosomatic pains, If he lived round the corner he would have got a smack.  This got me thinking back to about 1982 or 83.  I had been to the dentist on the Monday and had a tooth removed.  On the Tuesday I was back asking him to check if he had missed something as my face was in agony.  He looked at me disdainfully [how dare this upstart accuse me of bothching, mind you I would probably have felt the same had roles been reversed] but he looked anyway and what did he find, nout, nada, nothing, but he did give me a pointer.  He said do you have problems with your sinuses, Sinuses, I didn't even know what a sinus was let alone whether I was having problems with it, so he suggested a visit to the doctor.  So off I trot to the doctor and by this time my face is beginning to swell up as well.  Doctor looks at me examines me, and says, [knew her outside of surgery] well the swelling is a problem, but not to worry, you weren't pretty to begin with, Ha bloody ha.

Off I trot to hospital for an x-ray on the Wednesday, face is getting rounder and bigger by the hour, as is the pain,  pain killers are getting stronger until the Thursday, when I am on injections to knock me out as I am booked into the hospital for the Friday as they have discovered a growth in my cheek cavity.  Did the injections knock me out, don't be silly, of course not Well they might have done for a while but ask @ishbelstronach where she found me at 2 am in the morning, where, Oh, at the bottom of the stairs from the bedrooms to the downstairs hall, lying in a heap unconscious.  How did she find me, did she wake up and discover I wasn't there, not not really, sleep through world war 3 would she, unless it is one of the kids where only women and dogs can hear there wimpers in the middle of the night!

No as I tumbled to the bottom of the stairs I landed by the phone but was still aware enough to call that horrible woman doctor Chancellor who cast aspersions on my good looks earlier in the week.  Realising it was me on the phone groaning and that the phone had gone dead with no dial tone she dialled our number until the ringing phone woke Ishbel up and got her out of bed.  In short order I was transported of to the local hospital in the wee small hours of Friday morning.   After being brought round from surgery I was informed by the doctor that they had pickled the problem and were going to use it in class,  it was a polyp apparently.  I had suffered a broken nose in the past and this had blocked up one of my nostrils.  The act of blowing your nose apparently prevents these things from growing, as they are present in everyone, so they tell me.  Anyway as I could not clear that particular route this thing had been growing for years and had started to grow so large that it travelled back up the sinus canal and then down in to my cheek cavity where coincidentally it was on the same side as where the tooth was that has been removed.  I could go on and tell you about the bandages that were stuffed up my nostril and the problems they caused, but I think we have had enough graphicness for this blog, don;'t you and as I say all down to that man Hicks for reminding me, thank you Michael.

So, as you can see after all the the misfortune experienced by me and @ishbelstronach, hers because of the mess she cleaned up, mine because I WAS DYING, see, Attack of the Poorlies and why men need Women . I was feeling much better the following morning (Wednesday) and so decided I would pop into the surgery, not for an official visit you understand but rather just to see if there was a bug going round that would explain the previous evenings awfulness.  There hadn't been and I was sent in to see the nurse, who was at a loss to explain it but has put it down to dehydration as I did remember NOT to take a bottle of water on my walk with me and it had got to about 30 degrees, I think that is about 88 American.  But my Blood pressure was taken and pronounced normal, and comment was past about my slimness.  A further appointment was made, for me today to see the Doctor and I have come away from that, awaiting an appointment at the hospital, cos apparently I am going deaf, do you see that @ishbelstronach and @_MarieKennedy and @jenniestronach I am NOT ignoring you all I AM DEAF, so shout louder, when you want my attention.

   Best Wishes 

Apologies

This is an apology that may not need to be said, as you may not need it.  But if you don't need it, the next question is why not?

What is he twittering on about I hear you ask, well it's simple, comments, yes comments.

Comments on blogs, I started writing these irrelevant little witticisms back in April and I have to say in all honesty I was not looking for much by way in response, but like everyone I suppose it is nice to get at least some feed back, but I have not been to bothered that I have not had any, or have I?

Ishbel, you know the better half the one who puts up with me and cleans up after me when I am unwell, see An attack of the poorlies and why men need women happened to mention that she had posted a comment to one of the blogs, not the clean me up one but Musical reflections (and I still hate the Osmonds) but when I checked my account dashboard there was none to be had.  Strange. spooky, maybe Blogspot had achieved where I had failed; in blocking the wife out of my life (only kidding)!

I then went in to the site help page and I have to say the first thing with it is, it's pretty crap navigating around and not easy to find things, even with all the headings,  Never mind, after a while I finally found something and a couple of comments from other bloggers who appeared to be having similar problems, with responses from others who had solved the issue by getting rid of the 'embedded' comment box at the bottom of the post and changing it so that when you clicked on 'post comment' a new page opens up in your browser allowing comments to be posted from there.

So, if you have posted a comment to any of my blogs and you have been offended that I have then not responded to your comments, although I am not sure, until that happens, that I can, comment on a comment that is, then this apology is for you, sorry.

If on the other hand, if you are one of the 1013 people who have read my utterings, and you haven't left a comment, why not?  Even if you think what I have written is a load of b****cks do feel free to let me know, I have been married for ages so have a thick skin....................

 Best Wishes 

An attack of the poorlies - and why men need women!

Went for my walk last night and got back thinking I had either been hit by a large vehicle while crossing the road or been mugged by a gang of the local bottle smashers.  I must have been hit over the head as I recall neither event.

Now as @ishbelstronach will testify I do not exaggerate it when I feel poorly, it has really only happened once before when I had proper flu and not the wimpy man flu that guys usually complain about and take days to recover from! Sorry guys been a manager and seen it....

Well tonight I felt I had those symptoms again.  My body felt as if it had been through a pulveriser all aches, I was nauseous, and it was like the original no weight loss Mr Fat was back.  I was sitting, strike that, hanging onto the loo apparently as white as a sheet and a pool of sweat was forming around me as the room spun.  Not nice.

Before I became completely incapable of anything, I couldn't shout and I did not have the energy to bang on the floor, but I had the smart phone with me.  I sent Ishbel a text with one word, 'basin' and then collapsed against the wall.  As I mentioned earlier I am not one to get sick much or physically sick for that matter, but in our house over the years, the request for 'basin' can only mean one thing, someone is about to throw up, and usually the basin is too late!

Well thankfully this time it wasn't and 9 hours later I still haven't thrown up.  But I was sitting on the loo and the symptoms were also accompanied by a dodgy tummy wanting release from the other end, not nice!  Anyway Ishbel had brought me the basin and hovered clucking over me as wives and mother's do.  After about fifteen minutes thinking I was going to be sick and a soft trickle from the other end I managed to prop myself against the wall and attempted to clean you know where, however as soon as I stood up the room started spinning as well and the inevitable happened things started to escape.

Now I am really not trying to put you off whatever bit of food you might be nibbling at the moment, and I am sorry if this is not the usual light hearted blog I normally post, but there is a reason for the graphic tone above, and it is this.

On standing up and being overwhelmed, Ishbel had left the door open while she turned the bed down and switched on the overhead fan in the bedroom and the law of unintended consequences then came into play.  Not being able to stop myself I staggered from the bathroom to the top landing to the bedroom while discharging from the rear.  I was incapable of stopping it.

What did Ishbel do , wiped and cleaned without a word of complaint or a moan for probably the next hour, while continually checking up on me.  I still feel lousy 9 hours later but is there a sign of my horribleness anywhere in the bedroom, landing or bathroom, NO, not one sign.

That's what wife's and mothers do, they clean up after us without complaint, and sometimes we just don't appreciate them enough.

Thank You Ishbel

Best Wishes

.

Musical Reflections (and I still hate the Osmonds [not])

"Respect", just listening to the great and marvellous Aretha Franklin biopic on BBC Radio 2 and I got to thinking, dangerous I know, but it happens from time to time, and I couldn't help thinking while I listened to that and other songs by this wonderful lady that music so does, like books, play an important part in my life and I suspect lots of other peoples's lives too.

"Forever, Forever .... My darling believe me...  Say you love me too.... " not only are the lyrics supremely written by the various writers, Bacharach and Davis Ashford and Simpson, etc. etc.,  but they are then delivered with an intensity and passion that few of today's singers can match.

Have you also noticed, if you are of a certain age of course, that lyrics written back then, whether it was the 50's, 60's or 70';s that they had verses and choruses and not just endless repetition, O.K. some of it was repetition but not to the extent where in today's modern song you get three lines endlessly repeated throughout for three and a half minutes and in most cases you are even hard pressed to know what they are, unless they have been printed on the inside of the CD cover, or is that just me?

Don't think, because of those comments that I do not buy music today, I do and if you were to look at my collection it is fairly eclectic.  On my laptop in the office for example I have over 13000 tracks ranging from albums from Pop, to Classic, to Country, to Jazz to Blues, to Opera to Soul.  I have just about everything, and I listen regularly.

And in amongst that lot there are people today that I would (almost) sell my soul to listen to over and over again, much as poor put upon Ishbel (the other half you know) will testify to, as I endlessly replay a particular track.  Seal, The Highwaymen, Helen Reddy, Amy Winehouse, Cat Stevens, Carl Orff , Deacon Blue, Dean Martin, Duffy, Hans Zimmer, Gnarles Berkley/Ceelo Brown, John Lee Hooker, The Kooks, The Flaming Lips, Paulo Nuntini.....this is just a snapshot of what is on here and what I listen to and gives a little idea of my tastes.   But as I started to write this just in response to listening to Ms Franklin, you can see already that it is going on and on and .  And, I could easily go on and on for you for a lot longer than I do, as with my like for books, I could do an Olympic event on it and be in the medal list.

Repetition of tracks is of course not the same as repetitious lyrics and replaying a track or an album almost always means that you pick something up that may have missed the first time round, whether that was the way the lyric sounded or the pitch of the voice or the length of the musical note, there is always something different.

A particular singer or song can also evoke long forgotten memories as well. Or, as in the case of The Waterboys track, "Everybody Takes a Tumble" this can make you smile if you are a fan of cycling and in particular to the Tour de France coverage on itv 4.  It was 2007 and at the end of each programme the producers give you a montage of the tour, normally accompanied to a soundtrack. and The Waterboys were the artists who were in vogue that year.  Now I have no idea who thought of it but on this particular track every time The Waterboys say "Tumble" or  "Fell" TDF cyclists would go rocketing off their bikes.  Not funny in the least, to those involved, but the track mixed with the footage was inspired, so, Chapeau to that man or woman for putting the two together. Watch it here and see if you don't go ooh, aahh, but smile too!  Everybody Takes a Tumble

Other songs and artists also bring back memories, such as Barbara Streisand singing the title song to her and Robert Redford's movie The Way We Were This was the first movie that I ever took Ishbel to see when we were courting.  We were in Berlin at the time and it was showing in the American movie theatre Berlin Wall Maps - The American Sector. I can't really remember the story line too much, but I can sing you the song.  I was a big fan of Ms Striesand before the movie and still am today.  Here is a link to a 1975 rendition of the song Ms Streisand Sings "The Way We Were" And I can't hear this song without thinking of our first cinematic experience together (mind you I did also take her to see the original "Texas Chain Saw Massacre" a few years later so don't be thinking I'm a big softy)!!!!!!!!!! 

Other tracks have influenced me and given me some kind of enjoyment, and not always or necessarily for the lyrics.  The music on its own can be so inspiring or uplifting and I am particularly drawn to 'Big Band' sounds with brass and winds and drums, and speaking of drums if you ever get the chance to listen to Japanese Taiko drumming, it really is foot and finger tapping stuff and gets the old blood vessels moving around at a lively pace, take a look here, Taiko Drummers

Fleetwood Mac, "Oh Well part 1", great lyrics and great sound.  Starts of with those electric guitar riffs like a cat screeching and then talks about me today, " Can't help it about the shape I'm in......." Remember my Alter ego, Mr Fat..... I remember getting thrown out of a coffee bar in my hometown of Coatbridge.  I was about 13 at the time when this came out and was on the jukebox and I played it endlessly back then, and still do today, but the cafe owner got fed up with it and threw me out, he only let me back in once the rep had changed the discs, sorry 45's in the jukebox! Oh Well

Blasphemy here I suppose, but I was never a big fan of the Beatles back then, and still not today, although I do have a couple of their albums, well it wouldn't be a proper music collection without some stuff you might not particularly like, now would it?  The Stones though I remember even before Fleetwood Mac there was the Stones for me, or rather it was vicariously through my elder brothers. I remember sneaking into one big brothers room, had his own little portable record player, you know the one square box with a lid on it and well......  Anyway there was I just getting into my teens and noticing girls, now there's a thing isn't there, do you remember me blogging a couple of weeks ago about the moral problems of an 8 year old and her boy friend dilemma? And here I am remembering that I STARTED TO THINK ABOUT AND NOTICE GIRLS AS I ENTERED MY TEENS, was that just me and that I was sad, or was that what it was like for other 11 -13 year olds back in the late 60's, answers below please.

Now, where were we, Oh yes, The Rolling Stones and sneaking into Billy or Bobby's room can't really recall which one it was, but I do recall sneaking in and, and putting "Honky Tonk Woman" on the turntable and waiting for those words to come round, "I met a gin soaked, bar-room queen in memphis,

She tried to take me upstairs for a ride."  Wow, thirteen years of age and beginning to hear things at school and noticing the fairer sex, what could be more tantalising than these lyrics to someone just literally bursting out of puberty, I ask you?

Manfred Man, The Marmalade Reflections of My Mind How can you not love this musical arrangement and those voices, go on I dare you to say you don't like it, Gary Pucket and the Union Gap Young Girl   " With all the charms of a woman"  For gods sake that's what we wee lads growing up wanted a Young Girl who was all woman, Oh Dear, I had better calm down, getting excited at the thought...   We didn't exactly know what all the lyrics meant and we picked bits out for ourselves that seemed to be meaningful to us, but then I suppose many songs are like that.  You take bits out and apply them to your life and your experiences and you remember them for that, I suppose.

Moving on Gene Pitney, The Birds, The Yardbirds, before the split and we had the Small Faces , before the split, it goes on...., The Tremeloes, Amen Corner , The Flower Pot Men, Susan Maughn,, the list goes on and on 

I recall working on the dodgems at the fair, when they visited town and apart from pulling the birds, I was 12, or 13 then, it gave us pocket money, free rides and tons of music with every ride blaring out something different and as you moved from one ride to the other through the crowds with one song fading and the other one rising in tempo, it was a great feeling back then to be part of that.

Moving into the early 70's of course and a veritable wall of sound that developed in the 60's was threatening to overwhelm us in the 70's and it continued to sweep across the country, making rebels out of us as it had our big brothers in the late 50's and 60's proper, well they were older and knew what it all meant, didn't they? And we of course were just rebellious upstarts learning to shout along with our favourites and take their message of rebellion to school and the youth club with us.  When I think about it now, that period probably saw the start of the decline in the church youth clubs that were all over the place then. 

They had manfully withstood the onslaught of the 60's and the Beatles and tried to compete with them, allowing some of the music to be played in the halls, but as the 60's came to a close and music got even better, yes it did, don't argue, and we wanted more, although there was nothing more to be had.  Our parents had given us everything, what little that was, of what they had anyway and in working class towns that wasn't much and just like today money was tight for the majority of people in those towns and cities and of course we were only a few years away from the winter and summers of discontent.  Whole parts of the country were laid off from jobs that ceased to exist overnight, and the youth clubs and the youth leaders couldn't find a definitive answer to what it was we wanted, and neither, really did we actually know, It was more,  that was all we wanted, more; but god knows what it was we actually did want....!

The likes of Black Sabbath, Rod Stewart, Slade, Alice Cooper, Bay City Rollers, The Osmonds, yes the Osmonds, They will get a special mention a little later, sub titled, "Stupid things we do when we think we are in love, and live to regret"! intrigued, well you'll need to wait. 

So, 1969, 1970  - 13, 14 and moving up to fifteen and there was so much music around.  Do you remember, we didn't even have walkmans back then let alone CD players and Ipod thingyme bobs, no, it was 45's and portable record players and portable radios and then we got our 'ghetto blasters' imported from America and you needed one of these with the tape deck and radio so you could record your songs of the radio from Caroline of Luxembourg, straight on to tape, Mind you you also needed to develop strong arms and muscle to carry them around, how we laugh at our selves now looking back , prats I think is one of the words that springs to mind, but then again we weren't because we were just doing what every must have kid today is doing, when they want the latest smart phone or  Iphone model only they don't need the muscles of a body builder to carry theirs around like we did, wimps.......

 I really don't want to put you off, and I could go on and on for a lot longer just looking at my catalogue of music and the memories that it bring back to me but instead I'll jump forward to the mid seventies and put you out of your collective inquisitiveness over the intriguing question of the Osmonds.

As I have mentioned in a an earlier blog I joined the Army at 15.  When I was 17 and a bit it was time to join my Regiment, they were in Berlin at the time and that was in 1973.

Now as you can imagine, the Army, as do all of the services, feed you fairly well, mind you the Army was the poor relation in that respect compared to the Navy and the Air Force, no, no, don't let me go off on one again. Anyway we were pretty well fed, but we did burn a lot of calories off and so individuals always found some way to supplement their calorie intake, my particular craving was for chocolate digestive biscuits, by the packet and orange fanta.  Where did I get these in Berlin, well the NAAFI shop of course.  And that is where I met Ishbel.  Well, no not really that is where I met Ishbel's mum who was working in the shop.  Long story short, she had a photo of her two kids on the wall behind her and I asked, "who's the bird" for those not in the know, Scottish vernacular for, "Excuse me Madam, but who is that terribly attractive young lady in the photograph behind you?"

"That's no bird, that's my daughter", "That's o.k. if she is free on Friday, she can come out with me".  Thirty eight years later I'm stuck, I should have listened to my Sergeant Major when I was a boy soldier and he said to me, "Stronach, you do know what your problem is, don't you"? " No, Sergeant Major" I replied meekly!  "It's your mouth Stronach, it's too bloody big and your brain aint quick enough to moderate what comes out of it. SO I suggest you keep it shut"!

Never listened/  So anyway, managed to meet up with the 'bird' and one of those little things you learn
about teenage girls in 1973, 74, 75, they were all in love with Donny Osmond.  So to woo the 'bird' what did I do, I bought every Osmonds LP that was already out and every one that came out for the next few years.  See what I mean about,  Stupid things we do when we think we are in love, and live to regret!

Best Wishes