Did I tell you I Hate Pigeons! But are they afraid of being turned into Zombies?

No, not the kind that turn up on the dinner plate that live in the country and are nice little pigeons,  but the common town/city dwelling feral rat like creature that inhabits our towns and cities and where the idiot masses feed them leading to them congregating and breeding in even greater numbers.....

In my humdrum day to day existence I look after a small parade of shops and offices for a large property company and one of the bane's of my life is pigeons and the mess they leave behind.

It was only recently as well that I learned from an expert that pigeons are prolific breeders and are at it constantly, sex for reproduction.  Apparently they are ready to breed from a few weeks after hatching and then that's it eat, shit, sex,, lay an egg or two and start again.

They dominate the roofs and it doesn't help that a local pub closed down a couple of years ago bordering our property and the owners have left it to become run-down and derelict and this is where a large proportion of the local pigeons have taken up squatters rights.

Now a few years ago the anti smoking ban was introduced in this country but being the ass that I am, that while I enforced it throughout the offices, my office remained an illegal smoking zone, until two weeks ago that is.  I had the dreaded lurgy that was going around and didn't smoke for three days........  Okay go on get it off your chests I can here the moans and groans from here, I'll continue when your finished .....

Okay, ready....

So, anyway having given up for three days I went back to work on the forth day and my office had sort of been fumigated by the cleaners and smelled quite fresh, so I have decided to not smoke in the office and obey the law.  So, I have now taken to joining the other peasants outside and while on the outside having my fag I look up and see the pigeons and the seagulls on all the roofs.

But what I have noticed over the last week is that there is a pigeon free roost area and not just pigeons, but the gulls and other birds in the area seem to avoid one point on the roof, as if it were plague infected or as if there was a hawk perched there and they aint going near it for love nor money and it is the spot on the roof with all the mobile phone masts and antenna!  Is it going to turn them into pigeon zombies if they get to close?

So, all those Mums protesting about the proposed erection of mobile masts near to homes or schools, maybe they have a point!  Is this equipment sending out harmful radiation or whatever and birds are attuned to it, more investigation needed I think on this and in the meantime a call to the man with the pigeon traps for the roofs to try and reduce the numbers again.......

Apparently there is a positive side to being Raped!

I read a report in The Guardian on line today, that made me feel quite ill...

For some people who've been raped and had the baby, even if they don't keep it, something positive comes out of that whole rape experience," pupils aged 14 and 15 were told.

Wow, who would have thought that something positive could come out of being raped?  But according to the statement above, it can!

Well, I have to admit here that I am a male and I have never been raped and while, as I understand it, that it is predominantly women who suffer this abuse I understand that men too can be raped as well.  Of course if a man is raped we would not continue to suffer in the way that a woman will through pregnancy and the decision to terminate or not, that pregnancy. I also have to confess that throughout my 'thinking' years as an adult I have from time to time read about the debate over abortion and I have always felt fairly ambivalent to the question of abortion but generally felt that it is a decision to be made by the individual to make, and hers alone.

But clearly this is not the case as 'pro-life' activists have decided that a woman attacked, abused and raped and who had no decision in that momentous and calamitous act carried out on them, should then have the decision on what to do with her body and that of the unborn child taken away from them as well.  Why don't we just tell women to get back to the chains of the kitchen sink and be done with it, let them know where their place is in life!

The foetus is an unborn child but it is still just a growing organism, which if allowed to come to term will be born and grow into a sentient human being, yeah, big deal, look at the sentient human being who attacked and raped the woman in the first place, one might argue, and I would, that anyone found guilty of such a crime should be medically castrated and locked away for life.  Yes, I am pretty unforgiving and I don't care who knows it.  I am married, have two daughters and 4 of my five grand children are girls.  

If any of them were ever to fall victim to this kind of abuse I would have a couple of reactions and they would be:

1. Have an abortion, if they fell pregnant as a result of this attack upon them as I would want nothing to do with this 'innocent' offspring of a twisted demented progenitor, and 
2. If I could lay my hands on the attacker I would happily take my sharpest kitchen knife to his genitals and leave him bleeding to death

But not the 'pro-life brigade, and what disturbs me even more is that these people are being allowed into our schools in the United Kingdom to spew their garbage to our kids, read it here and they are going on to tell them that if they do have an abortion that they are more likely to get cancer, including breast cancer,

"The link with breast cancer is because if a woman has an abortion, particularly in her first pregnancy, changes have to take place in her breasts. 

And then just to intimidate women even more they are turning up at clinics harassing them as they enter and leave, including photographing and videoing them.....

I'm sorry for saying it, well no not really, but, these 'pro-life' people are, as far as I am concerned, just as sick, twisted and deviant as the actual rapists who attacked the women in the first place.   They are continuing to abuse mentally, the woman who have already been put through, I imagine, one of the most horrific things that could happen to them in having their dignity stripped away from them, being physically  and mentally abused and then these 'pro-life' morons continue to hound them after the first attack,  and many are doing it in the name of religion as well.  Very caring, I don't think so.

They Walk Amongst us - They really Do!

IDIOT SIGHTING 1

My daughter and I went through the McDonalds take-away window and I gave the girl a £5 note. Our total was £4.20, so I also handed her a Twenty pence piece.

She said, 'you gave me too much money.'

I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me £1 back.'
She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the 20 pence and said 'We're sorry but they could not do that kind of thing.'

The girl then proceeded to give me back 80 pence in change..

Do not confuse the girls at MacD's.

IDIOT SIGHTING 2

We had to have the garage door repaired. The GARADOR repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.

I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one GARADOR made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a ¼ horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4 and he said, 'NOOO, it's not. Four is larger than two.'

We haven't used Garador repair since. Happened in Bromley, Kent UK

IDIOT SIGHTING 3

I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbour call the Highways Department to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'

Story from Crayford, Kent, UK

IDIOT SIGHTING 4

My daughter went to a local Kentucky Fried and ordered a Mexican taco. She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimum lettuce.' He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.

From Gillingham Kent, UK.

IDIOT SIGHTING 5

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an Irish airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'
To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'
He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'

Happened Luton Airport ..... UK

IDIOT SIGHTING 6

The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged co-worker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.

Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'

She is a Local County Council employee in Dartford Kent, UK

IDIOT SIGHTING 7

When my husband and I arrived at Our Local Ford dealer to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver’s side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the Mechanic "It's open!'
His reply, 'I know. I already did that side.'

This was at the Ford dealership in St Albans, Hertfordshire UK.

STAY ALERT!

They walk among us... and the scary part is that is they have the

RIGHT TO VOTE and REPRODUCE!

Saucy little Snow People

No shame these snow people!