I had noticed a couple,they were probably in their late 60's and they were quite small but really handsome, the lady was so frail and needed sticks to walk and they had their, I assumed, twin sons with them who looked to be in their 30's. They had gone in before me and when they came out they all looked totally devastated and the poor woman was struggling unsuccessfully to hold back the tears.
It really broke my heart to see this and put my pathetic whining into perspective and as I said, poor wee Dr Chan who clearly can be the harbinger of both good and bad news has to feel bad when she has to give the latter. How do they cope day in and day out discussing, treating and then ultimately sometimes saying you are probably going to die... It makes you think
When I got in I did mention my observations and asked how she was coping and hoped that she was bearing up under it all too, as it must be a real strain for her at times, she is such a nice wee thing.
Anyway, we got round to discussing me and I told her about my fortnight since phase 2 commenced including one or two symptoms I haven't mentioned to you all which were far to disgusting to publish.
The upshot of this was;
a) She thinks I may have been bleeding internally got a telling off for not phoning
b) My oxygen levels may have dropped dramatically, got a telling off for.....
c) Phase 3 of chemo has been suspended and I have to only take the chemo pills up until Friday of this week and then stop
Dr C is going to arrange some scans and possibly another gastroscopy, have a look at all that, and then possibly go ahead in arranging with Broomfield for the surgery to hack out the offending mass
So, all in all, apart from me being a dickhead, again (before wee Mickey @Mr_Hicks_Fans says it) good news I think. As we really need to get this bugger out, the only downside to that is that I have to start the chemo again, but needs must I suppose.
Finally, can I just say, if you know a Doctor and especially an Oncologist and they are your friends, hell even if they are not, and you know they have to regularly give out bad news to patients and their family;
GIVE THEM A HUG, AND SAY THANKS FOR THEIR DEDICATION
My friend went through this recently with her mum. Dr x had to tell her that she is dying. I would hate that job.
ReplyDeleteChin up. It helps to have a positive attitude - it really does - glad to see you can do it :)
Thanks Kerry, back to smiling again now that I have been off the chemo for a few days, but now I have toofache sheesh!
DeleteWell crap and good. I'm glad they are pushing up the surgery and you are way too damn stoic. Quit it! I agree. Being a hospice nurse is bad enough. I could never, in a million years, be an oncologist. But we do have ways of coping.
ReplyDeleteSounds like the two of you are getting along well, which is nice.
So, surgery, get that sucker outta there and then finish up treatment. It will be better.
yeah, it's an awful time for the patient and the Doctor Jules. Dr C is really lovely and so so tiny
DeleteGot the date for the CT scan, 28th so onwards and upwards from here on in .... xxxx